Where do I begin?  There’s a movement by a lot of female gamers, a call for more realistic female game avatars.  Characters like Lara Croft and the DOA girls are held up as shining examples of character design gone wrong; bizarre fantasies of game developers who have no idea what a real woman is.  This movement is, of course, an extreme, and as such it exists on the hazy border between reality and paranoia.  Lara Croft has saved the day often enough to have become a real character, but her figure remains as excessive as the women who take personal offense from it, so she is always a popular target.

It seems most “movements” work on the outer fringes of logic, trying to swing the mass opinion simply by being too strong to resist.  Most of us are less radical, and even the extremists must agree with me on certain points.  My logic is flawless.

I, along with countless other female gamers, prefer hot chicks.  I have no quarrel with good looking female avatars, even generously endowed ones.  9 times out of 10 I will try to put together the most aesthetically pleasing avatar I can.  After all, I have to look at her more than anyone else ever will.  I’d better like how she turns out.  Occasionally, of course, it’s fun to just be a giant troll or ogre with a big club and a crush on some poor pretty-boy, or a scarred veteran with a story to tell, and there’s the last 1 out of 10.

Within certain boundaries of reason, I think no one can argue that attractive game characters are awesome.  Outside those bounds, well, I often find myself cocking my head and wondering how physics engines can support the paradoxes of some female models.  Breast size is often used as a meter, and an inaccurate one, of a female character’s beauty.  Developers fail to understand that the two are quite independent, and that most of their characters can hardly appreciate their dubious gifts.  Breasts, especially ones of that size, really tend to get in the way.  Remember the amazons?  They cut the things off so they could draw a bow properly.

Usually there’s an inverse relationship between the size of a character’s breasts and her character development.  So we get to the heart of the problem.  As silly and sometimes amusing as some of these women are, the real kicker is their purpose, or lack thereof.  The only reason for these characters’ existence is to look ridiculous.  They add nothing, and they ruin the gaming experience for women who see this.  It may or may not strike men as absurd.  Having never been one I can’t speak for them.  However, I question the appeal of pixelated women when real ones already exist for the purpose of visual titillation.

Developers, I’m trying to help you.  If you’re going to put a female character in the game, put her in for a reason.  Being buxom is not a reason; it is an excuse.  There are plenty of games that have done this right.  Jade from Beyond Good & Evil is an ideal heroine.  She’s an incredible woman, attractive, and she has a brain.  Above her neck.  One that functions.  Samus Aran is one of the most loved game characters of all time, and she doesn’t go hunting space pirates in a swimsuit.  She goes armed with a super cool armored suit and a cannon.  Need more examples?  Alyx Vance.  April Ryan.  Yuna. See?  It is possible.  All of these women are strong female characters; beautiful, confident, sexy, and identifiable.

I’m not laying down a law against hot women.  I like beautiful female characters as much as the next girl.  I’m asking that they be gifted with more than, or maybe less than, impossible bodies.  Are brains and goals and stories too much to ask for?

- jinx

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