I have a couple friends, Wayne and Trevor, who get together once a week to discuss their feelings and poetry.  Since I moved to Oregon, I can’t participate in the weekly Wayne/Trevor poetry or movie nights.  But in memory of it, I wrote a poem.  And since it’s on the Frag Doll site, it’s obviously about Rainbow Six: Vegas.

Caution: this poem may cause an emotional outpouring during the reading and induce catharsis, so please do not read it and operate heavy machinery at the same time.  And if you do crash the forklift, don’t blame me!  I warned you!

A match starts, time counts down,
Players dash through the map.
With a gun, a pistol, grenades and a pack,
Each team draws close to the initial attack.
Combat commences with a frag at the start,
Hitting a door and blowing apart.
Pillar three pokes out and bursts down the hall,
Two Bravo players, near the soda machine, fall.
A whirl of fire encompasses two men,
The incendiary grenade puts the score at 4 / 10.
Bravo’s team’s down, so they all rush the Vault,
Media players hurry to put the clash to a halt.
In the thick of the battle something flies through the mass.
A green mist disperses; “Who threw tear gas?!”
As the vapor causes blurring in everyone’s eyes,
One man stands alone holding his MP9.
He switches to frags and kills both teams,
Grabs the canister and sets his score at 15.
He relaxes a second while Alpha team’s gone,
But with furry they come rush out of their spawn.
Holding the Vault, he shoots down the hall
Bobs up and down and gives it his all.
“Everyone hide, there’s 10 seconds left!”
Is yelled from a Bravo player giving their best.
In the end Bravo won, subduing all danger
While Alpha showed signs of rising anger.
Why were we surprised, after all he’s elite.
They exchanged GGs and accepted defeat.

So, what did we learn from the story? Tear gas is obnoxious, but sometimes it’s an effective strategy… even if you blind and kill your entire team.